I Need a Cracker...

Shadae Richards, 3 (2008)

Hey Good People!

On occasion, I play the favorite Auntie Sandra to a number of nieces, nephews (and sometimes little cousins who think I am their aunt to!). There is one in particular that works "Auntie Sandrawa" (very unique greeting...sounds like Sand-JWAH..I don't know...it is just different). Her name, Shadae and she just turned three years old. Among the many workings she puts on me, the one that I have to share is the cracker conversation.

On my way home from watching the movie, Sex and the City, (Sidebar -for someone who never (I mean never) watched the series, I loved the movie!), I got a call from my mom that "The Girls" were staying the night - Candace 9, Cierra 6 and Shadae 3. That should just tell you the story right there!

When I got home it was about 11 pm, the house was quiet and dark. I thought to myself, they are sleeping. Great, I will be "auntie" in the morning. I did my usual routine before retreating to room (up two long flights of stairs) - I got a tall glass of Kool-Aid and a bottle of water. Just as I was turning around to shut off the light a little girl says, "Hi Auntie Sandrawa". Shoot, it is her. I thought I was in the clear.

"Can I have a cracker?"

Easy. I gave her two crackers and she followed me up stairs. My mom's room is on the second floor. I thought she was going to dart into grandma's room. Nope. She was right on the heel of my foot. Then another one joined her out of no where.

"Auntie Sandra, can I sleep with you too?" Too? It dawned on me that Shadae had invited herself to sleep in my room and Cierra was just asking to join the party. What could I say? At least she asked. Shadae lives off of assumptions.

"Sure - where is Candace?" I asked Cierra.

She replies, "Sleeping with Grandma."

Ok, I thought, I can deal with just the two. We went up the second flight of stairs. Cierra jumped in my bed and was knocked out in a flash. I couldn't wait to do the same. I put my Kool-Aid and water on the nightstand as I began the second routine for the night - getting ready for bed.

All the while, Shadae is finishing up her crackers. I changed into my pj's really quick. I was tired and sleep was calling me. Shadae then begins the memorable conversation as I was washing my face.

"Auntie Sandrawa, I need another cracker."

Splashing water on my face, I said "No, you just had some." Splash, splash, splash.

Shadae - "But I need it."

Me - "No." (I thought I was stern!?)

Shade - "I really need it."

This girl is crazy. She was asking me to down two flights of stairs, get some little crackers, go back up the stairs and push my heart rate up?!

Me - "No - you will get it in the morning"

(In disbelief) Shadae - "Not the morning, I need it now!"

She don't know who she is dealing with.

Me - "Little girl, go to bed."

Shadae - "I'm not tired".

Hold up...she has lost her mind. I was not going to argue with a three year old. I picked her up and put her in the bed with the Dora doll she left in my room from her last visit. She looked at me and said, "You are not being fair".

Over a cracker? I put her under the covers next to her sister and said, "You will thank me for this lesson later. Go to bed and not another word."

Sista girl was mad at me! I turned on the TV to calm my nerves. She was wide awake. I told her three times to go to bed and she replies each time, "I'm NOT tired". Attitude, attitude I made a note to tell on her in the morning! Yes, I will tell on a three year old!

About fifteen minutes later, she started again, in a sleepy tone.

Shade - "Auntie Sandrawa?"

Me - "Yes"

Shadae - "Dora's tired".

Me - Well put her to sleep.

She thought she was slick. Instead of admitting that she was tired, she put it on Dora. Next thing you know, old girl was knocked out and had the nerve to snore! It was a long night. They were kicking the hell out of me as they tossed and turned the whole night. Uggh!!!

As daylight broke, Shadae woke me up with several taps. Stared dead in my face and said, " Auntie Sandrawa? I need a cracker. Its the morning!"

Showtime - Birthday Brings Back Memories

Hey Good People,

Last Friday, August 15th was my birthday. (You respond - "Happy Belated Birthday" and I say, "Thank You"). I got a number of text messages, voicemail messages and live phone calls from friends singing off key (I know they meant well - but they could have put it in a text!).

Anyway, I got a text from a friend that said, "It's Showtime....Happy Birthday." I bust out laughing when I read that.

I played basketball in high school - I was NICE! On a rare occasion the boys and the girls team was playing a double header. The gymnasium was packed. It was our high school version of a sold out concert at Madison Square Garden. We even had cheerleaders (well they were warming up to get ready for the guys - they would shout out a cheer every once in awhile for our game!). Well for some reason, I was on the money this day. We were playing some really tall and big amazon girls from I think it was Garden City. It was said we were the underdogs...the score did not say so! We were up by at least ten points.

Off of a missed shot, my cousin rebounded (there were five of us on the team..go figure) the ball and handed it off to the point guard. Our point had a wicked handled. I ran down the right wing - closest to the bench of the visiting team and set up for a three point shot. Got it - all net.

Same scenerio but this time the point guard went down the left wing and I trailed behind and set up at the top of the key. As a great point guard can do - she set me up for another three-point shot. "SICCCCKKK". Got it- the ball kissed the net. The crowd was going wild! My head was gassed up!

We were in sync - back to back assists for a three pointer. Three times is a charm! This time I ran down the left wing - to the corner set up for another three. The crowd is behind me screaming and cheering. My point guard dished of a nice pass as she barrelled into the paint. The next thing you know, the crowd yells, "It's Showtime", the shot left my hand "SICCCKKK". I turned around and said, "At the mother%*$&)@^ Apollo".

The crowd lost it. The gym was wild. The next thing you know I hear my Coach B called for a sub for "24". That was me. I wore number 24. I ran up to the coach and said in utter disbelief, "Coach, why are you subbing me? I am on fire." She responded in such a cool fashion, "Well drink some water and cool you a@@ down - you are about to start a ruckus in here."

The crowd booed the coach!

Everytime I hear "It's Showtime" - it brings back the crowd in my head!

(that is me in the picture - check out the form!)